most beautiful among all creatures,
you who so long to know the place
where your Beloved is,
so as to seek him
and become one with him,
now it has been stated:
you yourself are the home in which he dwells.
Here is a reason to be happy;
here is a cause for joy:
the realization that every blessing
and all you hope for
is so close to you
as to be within you.
find joy there,
and be present to him
who dwells within,
since he is so close to you;
desire him there,
adore him there. . .
On Tuesday of last week I celebrated my birthday; possibly the happiest birthday of my whole life…or, at least, of my life so far. God, who I experience as pure, complete Love and the creator of all that is positive, life-giving and regenerating in this world, is now at the centre of my life in a way that I never imagined would be likely or even possible before. But that´s the thing with Divine Love, once it enters our awareness…and as a result, colours our whole lives…all things become possible.
I looked at the evening landscape in the picture below, out of my kitchen window a few days later, and the final scene of the film What Dreams May Come immediately came to mind. It´s a film that leaves different impressions on different people: some see it as pure fantasy with no relation to the real world; some believe it´s incomprehensible nonsense; and some see the truth that lies within it, because they´ve glimpsed flashes of it for themselves. The overall message is that ´Love saves our Souls´ from the torment of our lived experience and that the real goal of life is to connect to, live through and act from this Divine Love that lives within all of us and which we see sacredly reflected in the beauty of the world that surrounds us.
It´s a message I´ve heard echoed in the weeks leading up to this special birthday, because I´ve spent them in the heart of this Christian community in Spain, living through the Biblical story and shared experience of what Lent, Holy Week and Easter really represent. They tell the story of the life, death and resurrection of Jesus…a human man who devoted himself to embodying the will of Divine Love and who discovered the power that it has to overcome every obstacle, even death, when we find the courage to trust it and to live by its guiding light.
I´ve found that the spirit of Divine Love moves within us, around us and between us…if we free our minds and our hearts enough to make space for it to work. It is endlessly regenerating and, when blocked, denied or rejected, it returns to itself and then seeks other minds and hearts that are open to receiving it and to welcoming it in. It is always nearby, always open to our invitation, but we must invite it in; through our compassionate actions, our courageous choices, our tender words and our respectful deeds; both towards ourselves and towards others.
I´ve learned that it´s not enough to wish for it. It´s not enough to pray for it. It´s not enough to simply speak the words, however well-intentioned, “I welcome you in”. I now know that, to have Divine Love present and active in my life, I must show it that I genuinely want its presence. I must work with it, by finding the source of it within myself and then acting consciously from that source in the things that I think, do and say in my active efforts to connect with others. I must balance my needs with the needs of those around me; because Divine Love envelopes us all equally and what it seeks, to work peacefully and powerfully through us, is harmony and balance within us.
I´ve learned, through sometimes painful personal experience, that this harmony and balance is only achieved when I move my focus from ´suffering and sacrifice´ to a focus of ´awareness and trust´…trust that the things my heart is calling me to do have a Divine intention. And the proof of that ´Divine intervention´ becomes clear to me in time, when I begin to see the positive effects of my balanced choices on the lives, attitudes and actions of those around me, and within myself.
My life so far has taught me that God´s Divine Love seeks to work peacefully and powerfully through us, and that it functions in seemingly miraculous and effortless ways, when we live from an inner place of its empowerment (which is the gift of this Love) rather than a sense of obligation or enslavement to it.
God loves us as much as every other person that we touch with the words, thoughts and actions that give sacred meaning our lives, because our sense of meaning is inspired by the spirit of Divine Love. And, when we live from a place of balanced love, for ourselves and for others, we invite the spirit of Divine Love to work through us, and this repeated choice ultimately becomes the testimony of faith that we leave behind us with the impact of our human lives.
Julian of Norwich was a 14th Century English Mystic who believed, from her own lived experience, that God is Divine Love. It´s the experience of God that I have also, because my heart tells me that it is so, and for the last 6 years (since I was first introduced to her writings by a friend), I´ve felt a great afinity with her; because her core belief is my core belief and it´s the foundation on which all of my faith in God since then has steadily grown.
Every week, I receive a summary of reflections and contemplations from the Centre for Action & Contemplation. It comes as no surprise to me, but fills me with a sense of gratitude and joy, that the contemplative piece they chose to feature on my birthday this year focused on the writings and beliefs of Julian of Norwich. I´ve reproduce the piece below in the hope that it touches something deep within the hearts of others too.
Love Revealed(Click title for link to original CAC website post) Tuesday, April 6, 2021
What does Julian of Norwich, a fourteenth-century Catholic anchoress, who spent the majority of her adult life cloistered in a small stone cell attached to a church, have to teach us here and now? She reveals the feminine face of the Divine in all its radiance and reminds us to seek God there. She teaches us that God’s love has nothing to do with rules and retribution and everything to do with mercy and compassion. She shows us that our failings and transgressions are simply an opportunity to learn and grow, and should be honored as such, but not dwelled upon. She translates the sorrows of this life as tastes of Christ’s passion and assures us that all passing pain will be transmuted into endless joy.
Most of all, Julian of Norwich promises that, in spite of appearances to the contrary, all is well. Not just that creation was beautifully made to begin with, and that it will all work out in the end, but that everything is all right at every moment, if we could only look through the eyes of love. Such a perspective is difficult to sustain, Julian would be the first to admit. In rare moments of unitive consciousness—watching the sun rise, maybe, or giving birth, or singing to God in community—we may have fleeting glimpses of the cosmic design and see that it is good. But then the veil drops again and we forget. 
Because of our continual forgetfulness, Julian ends her Long Text with an emphasis on divine love. Note that while Julian here uses male pronouns for God, throughout her work she also shows that God is beyond gender by consistently calling God both Father and Mother.
Throughout the time of my showings, I wished to know what our Beloved meant. More than fifteen years later, the answer came in a spiritual vision. This is what I heard. “Would you like to know our Lord’s meaning in all this? Know it well: love was his meaning. Who revealed this to you? Love. What did he reveal to you? Love. Why did he reveal it to you? For love. Stay with this and you will know more of the same. You will never know anything but love, without end.”
And so what I saw most clearly was that love is his meaning. God wants us to know that he loved us before he even made us, and this love has never diminished and never will. All his actions unfold from this love, and through this love he makes everything that happens of value to us, and in this love we find everlasting life. Our creation has a starting point, but the love in which he made us has no beginning, and this love is our true source.” 
References:  Mirabai Starr, “Introduction,” The Showings of Julian of Norwich: A New Translation (Hampton Roads: 2013), xix.
“O God of earth and altar,
Bow down and hear our cry,
Our earthly rulers falter,
Our people drift and die;
The walls of gold entomb us,
The swords of scorn divide,
Take not thy thunder from us,
But take away our pride.
From all that terror teaches,
From lies of tongue and pen,
From all the easy speeches
That comfort cruel men,
From sale and profanation
Of honour and the sword,
From sleep and from damnation,
Deliver us, good Lord.
Tie in a living tether
The prince and priest and thrall,
Bind all our lives together,
Smite us and save us all;
In ire and exultation
Aflame with faith, and free,
Lift up a living nation,
A single sword to thee.”
- G K Chesterton
For as long as I can remember, whenever I’ve tried to find an answer to the question ‘What is my purpose?’ or ‘What is my destiny?’ the infuriatingly simple and equally mystifying answer that invariably popped up was “You’re here for people like you”. Over the years I’ve tried decoding that to mean “Listening to and loving people like me”; “Writing a book for people like me”; or, even more tangibly, “Creating a hostel on the Camino for people like me”, but none of them felt like ‘my real purpose’, more like something I would enjoy doing and which would, coincidentally, also be of service to others.
So I’ve tried asking myself, more simply, what ‘people like me’ actually means and I’ve taken detours down roads of belief that also failed to arrive at the answer. I’ve told myself “We’re all the same at heart (which is true), so that means I’m here for ‘everyone’ (which is false)”. Because we all know that “You cannot be all things to all men” and neither, I believe, are we supposed to be. Following that path just leads ultimately to exhaustion, disappointment, compassion fatigue and loss of respect for others and for ourselves.
Then last week, completely unknowingly, someone answered my question for me. In describing what I would call ‘inner reflection’ or ‘contemplation’ they used the term ‘navel-gazing’ and that’s when the penny finally dropped: “I’m here for ‘the would-be Navel-Gazers’”. And these are the people that I write for and talk to in my Blog posts, although anyone with an open heart and mind is welcome here.
I use the name would-be Navel-Gazers ‘tongue-in-cheek’ and ironically but also deliberately, because it captures beautifully the essence of what I believe. Generally, it’s not a name that’s used positively to describe ourselves or others. It implies that we’re self-absorbed, detached from reality and too preoccupied with our inner feelings, thoughts or problems. It’s not a name that contains a lot of love or genuine desire for connection, understanding or compassion, when applied to ourselves or to others. It’s a ‘closing down’ rather than an ‘opening up’ phrase.
But I write for anyone who’s open to the idea and value of contemplation, anyone who wishes to explore the part they play in co-creating their experiences and their relationships, anyone who believes in the power of Divine Love and Divine Purpose. In short, anyone who believes, as I do, that we still have a lot more to learn. Because the more open we are to exploring our automatic reactions to similar people and situations the more we come to recognise the limitations in our capacity for experiencing, recreating and sharing Divine Love.
It’s an undeniable truth that we’re all connected, as members of this diverse and beautiful species called ‘the Human Race’, but we’re also distinct and different individuals for a specific reason…and I believe it’s a Divine reason. If we ‘close ourselves down’ or try to bend ourselves or others into a shape that conforms to a set idea of how we should be, we dishonour our own selves greatly and we dishonour the individual seed of the Divine that we all carry within us. It’s a seed which has a personal message and purpose for each one of us, I believe, and for the people that we come into contact with throughout the course of our lives. But we have to be prepared to open our hearts and our minds wide enough to give it space and to let it grow.
We can look to others to tell us what our identity, purpose, or way of being should be, and then try to build our lives and personalities around the outside messages that we receive, or we can give ourselves permission to cultivate more inward reflection and discover the more open, compassionate and natural person we were born to be. In that way we stop needing to expend so much mental and emotional energy on meeting other people’s expectations and, instead, use what feels intuitively right to us in our (more open) heart.
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
There’s an interesting YouTube video that explores the balance we need to find and maintain within our lives between attachment (maintaining loving relationships with others) and authenticity (being true to ourselves) in order to grow into healthy, happy and self-respecting individual adults. It describes how so many of us largely lose our intuitive connection with our natural selves during childhood, in an effort to retain the love of those people we have close relationships with. And it explains how we unconsciously carry this ‘altered way of being’ into our adult lives.
I believe that a healthy dose of inner reflection, not about the past but about what is happening to us here & now and the automatic ways that we react to similar situations, helps us to make what is unconscious, and often unhelpful to us and others, more conscious. That way we become freer to make informed choices about ‘how to be’ as adults on a day-to-day basis, firstly in relationship with ourselves and, then subsequently, with those around us.
I’ve walked thousands of miles over the last 4 years and I’ve met hundreds of people from countries all over the world. I’ve had deep, meaningful and sometimes tear and love-filled conversations with complete strangers who were on pilgrimages of ‘reconnecting with themselves and with God ’. Many of them came to realise the inner hole that was left when they tried to be something that they believed others wanted them to be, instead of connecting with the inner source of Divine love that allows them to openly and unapologetically just be who they are. Taking time for inward reflection enabled them to do this.
The term ‘navel-gazing’ appealed to me for another reason too, because of its connection to the process of birth and the moment when we’re physically ‘cut free’ from our mothers’ bodies, becoming individual human beings in our own right. To look at our navels is to remind ourselves of a time when we needed gentle handling, valuing, love and protection, whether we received those things or not. We never lose the need for these things but, as fully-grown and independent adults, we’re now responsible for recognising that fact and for providing them for ourselves.
Cultivating gentleness and understanding towards ourselves, however we choose to do this, is a sign of self-nurturing, growing inner maturity, self-acceptance and strength.
What experience has taught me is ‘the more I live my life as the person my heart tells me to be, rather than as others might like me to be, the more I experience deep and meaningful connection with others’. I’ve learned that ‘just being myself’ acts as its own service to those I am meant to help because it somehow enables them to relax their habitual defences, to let down their guard and to share the most tender and vulnerable parts of themselves. This is an amazing expression of trust when it happens and it answers any doubts I have about ‘purpose’ or ‘destiny’ when it occurs. My purpose is simply ‘to whole-heartedly be myself’ and every day I learn new ways of doing that whilst also trying, through example, to encourage others to do the same.
I’m here to sing my individual song of Divine praise, and the words to my song are;
“Recognise absence of Love, in yourself and others, when you see and feel it. Be honest about it and don’t try to cover it up with distractions, addictions, rhetoric or denial. Find the seed of Divine Love within yourself that lies deep within your heart, underneath your fear and pain, and take your strength and validation from this…only this…because this is where God resides within you. Remove all the walls of anger, fear or judgement that you’ve built around that seed, and then watch as it grows into what it was born to be; a beautiful, fruit-bearing manifestation of faith, hope and love.
And when that fruit eventually breaks down into seed again, as it inevitably will, spread that seed as widely as you are able to, with faith that some of it will fall on fertile ground.”
So blessed be the navel-gazer in all of us, no matter how tiny he or she may be. Because that’s where, I believe, the seed of self-acceptance, true compassion and Divine Love has been planted and is waiting to grow…
“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”